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Can You Scoot Down a Little More?

Geez, can you guess what I did yesterday?

I think I’m probably going to hell. As I saw the top of my doctor’s head peeking and bobbing above the paper sheet as I waited to hear the dreaded words, “please scoot down… just a little more… a little more,” I couldn’t help but find the humor.

Why do they call it a sheet, anyway? I’ve used Kleenex with more fibrous qualities.

I wondered how freaked out my gyno would have been if I had asked him to hand me my phone so I could take a picture. Yea, I know, I’m probably the only person in the world who thinks this was funny.

These situations urge me to behave poorly. I think it’s hysterical how many places doctors can look to avoid the real subject, in this case my hoo haa and boobaledge region. I’m no less guilty.

I certainly don’t want to lock eyes with the dude who is trying to figure out if my uterus is healthy, and I’m positively sure I don’t want him to get distracted and leave the mumbo jumbo Q-tip hanging from my parts as he’s completing the pap smear, or worse yet the speculum. So, I laid there like I was supposed to and suppressed the sarcastic comments swirling around my head. At least he hadn’t been crushing any ice with his bare hands before he came into the examining room.

I couldn’t resist though getting a quick shot before I got dressed. The good news is everything is apparently where it should be, and I’m good to go for another year. How about you? Have you gotten your parts checked by a professional this year?


3 Responses

  1. Yep, not long ago. Have to say I love my lady parts doc. Much as one can love the person invading one’s privacy like that.

  2. I’m due this summer. Luckily I have a great female gyno – much more comfortable for that particular yearly exam.

  3. Yea, I’ve had women and men docs…trust is the most important. I had a boob scare a couple years ago and loved the way my doc handled it so I’m hooked even though he doesn’t have lady parts.

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