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Beneath It All

The trainer I’m working with forwarded me a link to a log that chronicles a transformation challenge she began at the beginning of the New Year. Wow, I was amazed. I guess I just assumed that she was always as buff as she appears present day. It’s going to be harder to hate her now when she’s pushing me to what I think was 15 reps past my limit. She’s obviously put in the work herself.

There’s something about our sessions that I makes me want to do better for her than what I might push myself to do. Maybe it’s because to whine aloud would sound way too lame once the words hit the air. Instead, I just keep going and she seems supportive.

It does make me wonder about her story. I’ve known for a long time that everyone has a tale beneath what is taken out in public; all I have to do is look in the mirror to be reminded.

Sometimes I avoid the deep inward glance. It can be squirmy at times – a childhood when I learned more about life than what someone should know in a lifetime; holding children and waiting for them to die in my arms; losing 100 pounds. Strangers can’t see all those things on my face so why would I expect others to be all they appear on the surface?

It may be my warped version of “on the bright side,” but the really cool thing about evolution is what we take from all the shitty things we endure. Each of these difficult periods in my life made me a better human being.

It’s not to say that I would wish bad things on others, but the stupid-ass idiom of what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger, may hold more truth than what most of us like to believe.

I like to know people’s stories. I’ve always liked to know what’s beneath the surface. I used to ask my Gram all kinds of questions about her life, and she was one stoic woman, not willing to release many details. She would often ask why I wanted to know about such unpleasant things or tell me I was nosy. But to know about her and her story was to learn about me.

I’ve struggled my whole life with the lack of control that I would like to have over the minutia of my life. Mostly now, I get the fact there is far more outside my suffocating grasp. When embracing it all, the fun and scary parts may take me places even better than the one I find myself in today, which is pretty damn sweet.

So, what’s your story?

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2 Responses

  1. Most of the best lessons I’ve learned in life resulted from enduring a negative situation. Most of my successes came from the lessons I gained from my mistakes. Life is wonderful that way.

  2. Yep, I agree completely. It’s funny how things work out that way.

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