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Make Your Choices Count

I rise about 5:10 a.m. I do that so I can write for a little while, drink a couple cups of coffee and exercise before heading out to work. When I first started the new job, I even walked the dog for about 40 minutes, but I decided I wanted to use that time to extend my writing. I must now give more thought about how I spend my time given the fact there seems to be less of it now.

While Russell was on spring break I didn’t walk the dog in the morning and I kinda liked that so I decided to take that time back, which means he has to drag his happy ass out of bed a half hour earlier to walk the dog, ahem, walk his dog.

Yesterday, he stomped by me on my exercise bike and shouted, “You know you could walk her instead of riding that thing.”

I COULD.

I could eat a hot fudge sundae every day on my way home from work – no one would know but me.

I could skip exercise altogether.

I could stop preparing healthy meals.

I could tell him what I really think of his stupid idea and Lyle’s too since he’s also on my shit list this morning.

I know they are both stressed this week as they resume the work and school schedule that doesn’t include me as cruise director. Last night when Lyle threw his little tantrum keeping me awake until midnight, I thought of all the things I COULD do this morning to share the love. On top of the list was turning on the lights and TV at 5:10 when my alarm blared.

I want to know if anyone else thinks about all the vindictive things they could do when people piss them off. Sure, I know serial killers don’t necessarily have happy thoughts all the time, but what about regular people? Do they sit around thinking about all the nasty things they could do to inflict discomfort on their families? Sometimes it scares me how many of these ideas flow through my head.

This morning I opted for the high road. I know extending the negative energy will result in bad things for everyone, but damn it would really be fun to go turn on the light in our bedroom about now.

Instead of “could,” I “choose.”

I choose to let them take responsibility for their actions. They don’t need me sticking my nose into things.

I choose to put myself at the top of the to do list and take care of my needs – even when that is not the most popular concept.

I choose to exercise in ways that is beneficial to my mind and body.

I choose to believe that focusing on the positive yields big payoffs.

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4 Responses

  1. I love your choices! I need to emulate you.

    BTW – since I have not been reading your blog that long… I wondered how old your son is.

  2. One thing I’ve learned listening to Buddhist dharma talks is that our thoughts are not actions (I know…that’s kind of a “duh” thing to realize, but I used to assign guilt to my thoughts when I’d DONE nothing wrong). It’s the decisions we make through our intentions that cause our actions to be helpful or not helpful in our own sanity and happiness. You made (and will continue to make, I know) good decisions for yourself. And taking the high road, as long as the intention isn’t to rub someone’s nose in it (not that I’VE ever done that before …lol) is always the best choice.

  3. Karen – my son is 15 going on 80. He’s a great kid, except when he’s not!!! No, he really is a cool human being. He is so much like me it’s not even funny! I’m sure that’s why we tangle at times.

    Lynn – I was right there with you until you said I shouldn’t rub someone’s nose in my high road, doh! Thankfully, new days bring new attitudes!

  4. I get it! I have two boys – 20 and 17. It is so funny when I see myself in them. Usually the not so good traits:(

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